Angelina Jolie Buying Wedding Gown From Goodwill: Example of the "Kindess Trend" in Weddings

2006-03-10T11:43:00.000-08:00

Christina Aguilera did it for her December 2005 wedding. Angelina Jolie's doing it for her upcoming wedding to Brad Pitt. And couples everywhere are including acts of kindness as a part of their weddings too, making this one of the hottest emerging wedding trends right now.

It's “The Kindness Trend” in weddings...

Tabloid darling Angelina Jolie has apparently given her stylist the word to find her a wedding dress. Tongues are wagging that it means she and Brad Pitt are getting closer to becoming a real-life “Mr and Mrs”. But, as someone who watches wedding trends as part of my role as editor of SuperWeddings.com (http://www.superweddings.com), the most intriguing part of this story is where Jolie, who earns millions of dollars for each of her box office hits, intends to get her dress.

No Versace for this celebrity bride-to-be; according to reports, the controversial actress turned humanitarian wants to purchase her wedding dress from a Goodwill store (Goodwill Industries International). That way the profits go to help the needy. Jolie is presumably hoping that the publicity generated by this move will spur other brides to do the same.

I predict they just might.

There is a hot new wedding trend in which couples everywhere are incorporating a charitable element into their big day. I use the term “kindness trend” to refer to the growing number of couples who are doing something generous for a good cause as part of their wedding celebration.

Weddings typically have a rather self-indulgent element to them, so it’s exciting to see couples generously opening their hearts to others on their wedding day. It’s a wonderful way to celebrate the love they share – by sprinkling some of that love out to others by doing good.

I believe that kindness is contagious. With any trend, the more people see of it, the more likely they are to adopt it. But, I think people feel inspired by the good deeds of others. It makes them want to do something good too. When you think about it, it’s a really beautiful way for a couple to start their new life together. You've got to admit, its got a good vibe to it.

I predict the trend will continue to pick up momentum over the next 12 months, but unlike other trends that fade completely after reaching their peak, I think the concept behind this one has some staying power. Trends, by their very nature, are flaky. One day everyone’s doing a particular thing, and before long it’s never seen again. But fortunately kindness never completely goes out of style. I think that this current trend will show people how easily charitable elements can be incorporated into weddings, and I expect those ideas will continue to be seen at weddings long after this is no longer the ‘it’ thing of the moment.

On a personal note, I regret that this trend wasn’t around when I got married in ‘92. I personally have a lot of concern for the well being of animals. Looking back, making a donation in each of my guest’s names to a no-kill shelter would have been more meaningful than all those pretty little wedding favors we gave away. Sure, the favors were gorgeous, but doing something to make a difference would have felt really awesome. Unfortunately, no one thought of doing this fifteen years ago

Having made weddings my business since 1991, I admit the message of the wedding industry is often spend, spend, spend. It’s not often that you’ll hear someone who makes their living from weddings suggest that brides spend their money in a place where there is no profit to be made. At SuperWeddings.com we have an online store where we sell wedding favors, but you know, if a couple is willing to put their money into something charitable instead of buying our do-dads, I'm good with that. That makes me very happy.

So what’s the reason behind this growing trend? I've got a theory. In recent times, we’ve witnessed a lot of really harsh realities. September 11. America at war. The Tsunami. Then Katrina. As they spend all that money on a big one-day celebration for themselves, and revel in their own happiness, a lot of couples are trying to reconcile that with the suffering many others are eexperiencing. There may be a little pang of guilt, or simply a genuine desire to share their blessings with others who are nowhere near as fortunate.

Here are some ideas on how you can incorporate the kindness trend into your own wedding:

* In place of traditional wedding favors, make a donation to a worthwhile cause in each guest’s name. At the reception, present each guest with a small nicely printed card explaining that this has been done.

* Suggest that instead of wedding gifts, guests make a contribution to either a charity of your choosing, or a cause that is important to them. Pop star Christina Aguilera did this when she wed last December and requested that guests make donations to Hurricane Katrina victims rather than giving wedding presents. Even fictional characters are taking a shine to this trend; the popular comic strip character Cathy also did this last year when she asked her guests (and readers of the strip) to make a donation to a particular California shelter for homeless animals!

* Some gift registry services will donate a percentage of all gifts purchased through their service to the charity of your choice -- look for one that offers this.

* Make arrangements to donate food left over from the reception to a local soup kitchen or homeless shelter.

* Donate flower arrangements to local hospices or nursing homes following the wedding.

* After the wedding, donate your used wedding supplies and accessories -- or even your wedding dress -- to Goodwill or another charitable organization that collects used goods.

* Or, like Ms. Jolie, shop Goodwill stores for your wedding gown and related accessories.

As this ‘kindness trend’ continues to gain speed, it will be interesting to see the different ways that couples will come up with to incorporate a charitable aspect into their weddings. To encourage couples to share ideas with one another, SuperWeddings.com is running a contest where you can submit your plans or ideas for including acts of kindness as part of weddings. Each submission will be entered into a drawing for a surprise gift. The point? That sooner or later kindness really does come back to those who give it. (Anyone who submits an idea is eligible to win - you don't have to be the one getting married).

I guess, when all is said and done, this much can be said about Ms. Jolie: Love her or hate her, her little plan to get some publicity and buzz going for charity-driven Goodwill stores appears to be working. She can't be all bad.

"Wierdest" Wedding Cakes....

2005-11-05T06:17:00.000-08:00

The other day, I was being interviewed by a journalist for a major women's magazine. The topic: Wedding Cakes.

As those of you who frequent the SuperWeddings.com site already know, we have a pretty fabulous cake gallery online. In fact, when we started publishing photos of wedding cakes several years ago in order to give our visitors ideas and inspiration for selecting the PERFECT cake, we were the first and only online wedding guide to do so. So it's not uncommon for journalists to come-a-calling when they want to talk wedding cakes with someone in the indsustry.

Which takes me back to the other day. Amidst all the typical wedding cake questions that were being tossed out at me - What's the most popular flavor this season, How much does the average cake cost, etc., etc. - the journalist I was chatting with asked, "What's the WIERDEST wedding cake you've ever seen?".

Now that brings us to an important point which should be made: There is a difference between "unique" or "distinctive and "wierd". At SuperWeddings.com, we're all about showing couples how to make their wedding more personalized, individualized, meaningful, and memorable - but "wierd" is not what we mean when we use these words, nor is it what we want in a wedding cake.
When dreaming up ideas for an amazing cake, yes, you want it to be one of a kind. You want it to express your peronality, your sense of style, the "theme" of your wedding (if you have one). But you want to stay the heck away from anything that could remotely be described as "wierd".

Your wedding cake is the showpiece of your reception. It's part of tradition that is centuries upon centuries old. That cake will be captured forever in your wedding photos - with you and your sweetie happily posed next to it. So you want to make sure that the style of cake you select has "staying power". It needs to make sense when you look at those photos 20 years from now. It needs to have some element of classic appeal. The last thing you want is to look back and be forced to confront the question "What on EARTH were we thinking?!".

I've seen this happen to too many couples during my nearly 15 year career as a wedding consultant. One former bride actually tried 'doctoring' her photos to remove the strange cake in her pics, and attempted to insert a more classic design in its place. Poor thing.

Your wedding cake can be whimsical, charming, adorable, artistic, expressive, even fun... and it should absolutely be imaginative and creative, but it shouldn't be a "gimmick". For the love of Pete, steer away from "wierd", or prepare to face regrets later. You can knock yourself out cooking up wierd and wacky ideas for the Groomscake if you feel so inspired - that's where the really odd and "out there" stuff belongs.

Are you having "wierd" cake ideas, or just getting "creative". Have you seen or heard about any bizzarre cakes at weddings? Let us know! Feel free to comment!